The Patriot Act has been extended for one more year. The only surprise is that anyone would be surprised. Though the Democrats have played the part of the weak, overpowered party, this is only a facade as evidenced by the fact that President Obama and his team support the extension. The Republicans have reinforced their appearance to their constituents as the ones who truly care about protection from terrorism while, at the same time, creating a larger chasm between themselves and those who view the Act as an infringing monstrosity of big government to the nth degree.
If I had the power, I’d imitate 007 and find a way to sneak into the hospital room unaware. I would use my bow tie to propel myself across the back alley, my suction-cup dress shoes to hang on the wall outside Big Brother’s window, use my ball point pen to laser open the glass, and then finish the job with my cuff links which would be useful in slicing apart the tubes that go from the respirator to the bureaucratic behemoth lying in a seemingly nonthreatening, but actual menacing position.
Of course, the reason I would have to take this risk in the first place is because of the need to bypass all of the unassuming hospital workers and security who have been duped into believing that this is a life worth saving. Not to mention the relatives – those who have been conviced that this beast is similar to a teenage family member who has been victimized by a drunk driver and who, regardless of the cost, must be sustained just in case he may wake up twenty two years from now, despite the fact that every medical expert in this and five surrounding states has declared him brain dead. To make matters more complex, these grieving relatives have been convinced that they not only must pay for the saving of this life, but that they must also give the hospital permission to use the creature as an experiment for “medical” purposes by giving it plastic surgery and bionic, mobile means. This procedure would make the evil mass take on the appearance of – hmm, let’s say – Sponge Bob Square Pants or Barney the Dinosaur and give it the ability to walk around the premises greeting all of the children and giving them cotton candy. His announced task would be to protect all of these innocent children from the real demons that surround them and, as a result, they would insist on his continuation, no matter if what he was saying was true or not. Since he has been made to look so approachable and has been given the power to guard their greater good, it is only natural that the masses rally around him for the sake of keeping him alive.
What these same rabid fans don’t realize, however, is that while they are sleeping and dreaming about the security he has brought them, he is looting their hospital rooms with the aid of the same staff who has sworn to protect him. When they wake up and find their territory ransacked and some of their belongings missing, they go to Mr Patriot Act to ask him what happened, since they are aware that he never sleeps. In short order, he convinces most of them that he was indeed the culprit, but it was for a greater purpose than they could comprehend and to just take his word for the fact that it was necessary and that it would be continued if the situation were to call for it in the future.
One would think that those small mobs who carry the torches and who recognize this horror story for what it truly is would perhaps get devoured by this monster that is monthly increasing in size. But it turns out that it could actually be routed with relative ease if it weren’t for some help from its friends. And relatives.
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